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Funny SMS

Here is A nice collection of really very funny SMS messages for you. Just try them the funny reactions will amaze you more.


When a Girl Accepts Your Friend Request
it means she accepted Your "Friendship" Not Your "Proposal"..
When a Girl sends you a Friend Request
it means She wants to be your Friend not Your Girlfriend.
When She Tag you
it means she wants to share her Thoughts with You
'n not that She's Lost in Your Thoughts..
When she comments on Your status
it means She's just being Social 'n not Flirting..
When She Like Your comment
it means She like Your Comment not You. !






When a Guy does Something Wrong... 


Girl : You broke my Favorite Lamp !!!
Boy : It was an Accident... I didn't mean to..!!
Girl : I can't believe you did this.
Boy : I'm Sorry.. !! :/ :/ :/

When a Girl does Something Wrong... 

Boy : You Lost My Dog??!!!
Girl : It was an Accident... I didn't mean to..!!
Boy : I can't believe you did this.
Girl : I already feel bad about it..!! Stop making me feel Worse..!!
Boy : I'm Sorry.. !! :/ :/ :/




Close Your Eyes ....,Relax Your Body....
'n Stop Breathing As Long As You Can...
Now Breath...
I Miss You As Much As You Missed The Air..!






Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too.. !






It is said that,
When a woman closes her eyes,
she sees the person
she loves the most!
And


When a man does that..

The slide show begins..!!




“Yes I love you.
You are so cute, smart.
My mother also likes you very much.
My father is ready to take up our relationship seriously.


So please don't say no to my proposal.
Accept me as your dearest, loveliest younger sister.
Happy Raksha Bandhan Bhaiya.”




2 Guys Were Following 2 Girls
Both Girls Took Rakhi & Tied To Their Hands.


1st Guy To Second-What Will We Do Now?

2nd Guy-U Marry My Sis,
I Will Marry Ur Sis




Sit 'n Cry for the whole day
'n Nobody shows intrest to know whats wrong,
But
Sit 'n Smile seeing a Msg on your phone
'n the whole damn world wants to know
Whose on the other side.. !!






One million copies of a new book sold
In just 2 days due to typing error of 1 alphabet in title.


"An idea,that can change your WIFE''
While real word was(LIFE).




Diffrnce B/w Theoretical & Pratical Knowledge..
Girls Scores 99/100 In Computer..


Dont Even Know How To Turn On Computer properly




WOmens are like Fruits.
Every Woman has her own unique taste 'n colour...


But
The problem is the Men.
They seem to love Fruit salad..!!




Girls are never wrong..


Just sumtimes
confused
childish
stubborn
senseless
emotional
unchangeable
crazy
stupid
idiot 'n even Mad!!

But,
Never Wrong ;-)




Early to bed and early to rise,


Proves man has no interest in his Wife.




I Found Aaladin's Lamp


I Asked Him to Increase
Your Brain Ten Times More..
He Laughed & told
Multiplication Does Not Apply On Zero.. !




Finally,
Its gonna be a dream come true:D 
Every girls dream man will come on a white horse! ;) 
All thanks to the petrol price hike! =D =))






Me without you and your Love would be
Like Facebook without Friends,
YouTube Without Videos
And
Google with No Results..
Keep Loving Me :))






Brilliant answers by the student who got 0%?


1)In which battle did Tippu sultan die?
A-In his last battle!

2)Where was the declaration of independence signed?
A-At the bottom of the page.

3)What's the main reason 4 divorce?
A-Marriage.

4)Ganga flows in which state?
A-Liquid state.

5)when was Mahatma Gandhi born?
A-On his birthday.

6) How will u distribute 8 mangoes among 6 people?
A-By preparing mango shake.!!




All Husbands are like Bluetooth....
Always connected when wife is around...
But
The moment wife is Away,
They Automatically start searching for the new Devices.. !!






If you Happen to Love a Girl,
Try from "Another State"
Even If it Fails,
You will End Up with one more Language in your Resume.. !






HUMBLE REQUEST :
He has served us Beer when we were Sad & Happy.
Now he needs our help. Please save Vijay Mallya
Pls ADOPT atleast ONE Kingfisher Airhostess..!!






Perfect Girl Doesn't Bother... 
Doesn't Shout.. Doesn't Flirt With Others.. 
Doesn't Lies.. Doesn't Cheat.. 


And Doesn't ExiSts.. :D :D




Every Tear is a sign of..


Cutting Onions..!!
Every silence is a sign of..

Zero balance..!!
Every smile is a sign of..

Daily Brushing..!!

Life is so simple..
Don't make it complex with difficult explanations..!!




Life is not about a handsome guy/girl by Your side,
but about a kamina friend with whom
you can discuss all shitt things about the handsme guy/girl,
Its not about nokia Nseries,
but about the last bettory present when you have
to say something special to somebody,
Its not about 10 hours work but about the 15mins Break,
Its not about wishng a friend on birthday
but about listning all gali's for forgetting it,
Life is about all the small moments you live daily...
The more you Enjoy Life the more Life gives you the reasons to Enjoy:-)






Love is Docomo, do the New.


Mariage is idea
can change Ur life

Wife is Hutch, where ever you go she folows

But

Frienship is Airtel 1atut bandhan




Every Girl Wants A Guy
Who Hugs Her When They're Watching A Scary Or Romantic Movie,
Who Gives Her His Jacket Even When He Himself Is Feeling Cold,
Who Will Always Be The One To Make Her Laugh,
Most Importantly He Will Love Her For Who She Is !


That Guy Is What Google Calls "No Result Found" ..!! :) :D




When a Woman says "WHAT?"
It is not because she didn't hear You
But
She is giving you a chance to change what you said;-)








“I Love Walking in Rain
So That No One Can See My Tears”,
.
It’s a Bit Old One
.
.
Do You Know The Latest One??
.
“I Love Walking in Any Season,
Because
Petrol is Now "78 INR" Per Litre”.. ! 






Girls have an unfair advantage over men:
If they can’t get what they want by being smart,
they can get it by being dumb.. !






A Doctor and Engineer Love Tha Same Girl.
Dr. Used to Give her a Rose
But
Engg. Used to Give her Apple Daily.


One day, Doctor Asks Why??

Engg: "An Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor Away"..!!

Doctor Shocked , Engg. Rocks!!!




Height of addiction-
In a college form,
When asked about
"PERMANENT ADDRESS"
A student wrote''www.facebook.com'':P :D haha






Boy: Wow...
You Look So Perfect with Incredible Body And Flower like skin...
What do You Use ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
Girl : Adobe Photoshop CS5!






Girl : Would You Like To Be The Sun Of My Life ? 
boy : Awwww ... Yes ! 
girl : Then Stay 9,995,887.6 Miles Away From Me...






Seeing a cockroach in your sandwich is not a problem...
but
Seeing Only half part of the cockroach in your sandwich
can surely be a problem..:-)






There are only 5 things we need in life: 
Good friends
Good income
Good food
Good sleep
&
"GOOD _ UCK"
(Interpretations may vary) but both r needed.






The police are on the way to arrest you
for stealing my heart
hijacking my feeling
and
driving me crazy see you in court.. !






In a party a handsome Guy Asked a Girl
"Are you Going to Dance?"
She felt so happy 'n said-"yes"
'n
The Guy Said-"That's Good, So Can I have Your Chair?:-D






Define Boss...
An Unique species
who is not able to differentiate between two seperate employees,
but
equally and uniformly spoils both persons life's harmony 'n Peace of Mind..:)






Student took his girlfriend to his home
After Completing Graduation....


Father Asked who is she....
Son replied.
My Campus selection.. !!








Why do we Need A Lover 
When so Many Love us?
Because,
"there are so many gases In Air,
But,
We Need nly Oxygen to Live.."






True Graduation Speech:


"First, I'd like to thank Google.
Secondly, I'd like to thank copy and paste!
Thirdly, I'd like to thank the xerox machine!";)




Define Checkmate:


When you tell Your Wife that
You saw a Lady on the Street who looked exactly Like Her
'n
She Asks "WAS SHE HOT?

You can't say NO or Yes.....






Missed call Theory...


5 Missed call from 5 different friends
You Missed a Party.

5 Missed Calls From Your Best Friend,
He wanted to Hang Out.

5 Missed Calls From Your Girlfriend,
you missed a good screw

5 Missed Calls From Your Wife,
You are Screwed Man.. !!




Don’t try to Understand
a Girl Completely,
If you do……
You either Go Mad..
Or
You will Start Loving Her.. !






Son: I Don't Want to Go to School
Mom: Why.?
Son: Want to work
Mom: What Work Will You Do With UKG Knowledge.?
Son: Take Tution for LKG GIRLS.. !! :P :))






*Most 'First Class' students get technical seats, some become Doctors and some Engineers.


* The 'Second Class' pass, and then pass MBA, become Administrators and control the 'First Class'.

* The 'Third Class' pass, enter politics and become Ministers and control both.

* Last, but not the least, The 'Failures' join the underworld and control all the above.




A girl never express her liking for a boy
Thinking boy should express first
'n
A boy never express with a fear of losing her as a friend
That’s why love stories end before it starts..!






Height of bravery for Girls .
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Going out of Home without make-up!






There was this lady who always thought LOL meant "Lots of Love". She managed to go through computer life without incident for a while.One day, the mother of a dear friend of hers passed away.She sent her the following message:
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Sorry to hear about the death of your dear mother, LOL"






?"Will be Ready in 5 Minutes" said by a GIRL..
and
"Will Call you Back in 5 Minutes" said by a BOY


Are the same.. !!




What does facebook teach us ??


To like 
To share
To pass caring comments
To spread nice messages
To poke
To view photos of our loved ones
To talk
To know the status
Most imp of all.. It keeps our friend in touch !




One spelling mistake can destroy your life.
A Husband sent this to his wife:
I’m having a wonderful time wish you were her.






Excellent Reply For The People Who Lectures Us Continuously...


"When Ever Death Will Come,
I Will Be Only One
Who Has To Die,
No One Else Will".. !!




Boy: Marry me.. ?
Girl: Do you have a house.. ?
Boy: No..
Girl: Do you have a BMW car?
Boy: No..
Girl: How much is your salary.. ?
Boy: No salary.. but,..
Girl: No but. You have nothing...
How can i marry you.?? Leave please.!!
Boy: (talk to himself) I hav one villa, 3 property lands, 3 Ferrari, 2 Porsche..
Why I still need to buy BMW.?!
How can I get the salary
when actually I'm the BOSS






If A Girl Laughs Loudly She Is Cheerful
If A Boy Laughs Loudly He Is Manner less


If A Girl Talks Sweetly She Is Charming
If A Boy Talks Sweetly He Is A Flirt

If A Girl Is Shopping She Is Trendy
If A Boy Is Shopping He Is Wasting Money

If A Girl Is Silent She Is Feeling Sad
If A Boy Is Silent He Is Being Rude

If Girls Walk In A Group Its A Group
If Boys Walk In A Group Its A GANG.. !




Unavoidable Fact For BACHELORS:
Love Makes Our Own Parents As Enemies.
But
Friendship Makes Others Parents As Our Parents :)






LOL: One friend says to another -
"I have Facebook,Twitter,Google Plus,MSN Messenger,
Skype 'n Twitter."


2nd Friend: "Dude, do you have a Life??"

1st Friend: "OMG! No! Send me the link!"




No English Dictionary Has Been Able To Explain
The Difference Between The Two Words COMPLETE And FINISHED,


In A Way That's Easy To Understand.
Some People Say
There Is No Difference Between COMPLETE & FINISHED.

I Beg To Differ Because,
There Is : When You Marry The Right Woman,
You Are "COMPLETE"...
And
When You Marry The Wrong One,
You Are "FINISHED"!
And
When The Right One Catches You With The Wrong One,
You Are ..."COMPLETELY FINISHED" !




Never believe in 3 people:
Sagittarius, Aries, Pisces
They are the most selfish and mean. :/


Never lose 3 people:
Taurus, Cancer, Capricorn
They are the most sincere and true lovers..

Never share with 3 people:
Virgo, Libra, Scorpio
They can never keep secrets and cheat people by crocodile tears :/

Never reject 3 people:
Leo, Gemini, Aquarius
They are true,honest friends and never think bad for any one..?
which one is yours???? :D




What's The Difference Between Stupid 'n Idiot?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Stupid Will Never LIKE This Post.
'n
Idiot Will Never Comment On This Post.


What Will You Do Now.. ? :D




The story behind "ladies first":


Long ago, a man 'n woman were madly in love.
They wanted to get married but their parents didn't approve.
So they decided to kill themselves.

They thought the best way to do it was to leap off a clip.
The man couldn't bare to see his sweetheart fall before him.. !

so he convinced her he would go first, and he jumped..
.
.
.
.
.
But that bitch never did.. !




Some Sentiments Expressed At Their Best...


Dear Facebook,
Just Wait, One Day They All Will
Leave You Too!
Sincerely,
Orkut

Dear Optimist,
That's Not A Light At The End Of
The Tunnel, But A Train!
Sincerely,
Pessimist

Dear Icebergs,
Sorry To Hear About Global
Warming.
Sincerely,
Titanic

Dear Yahoo,
I've Never Heard Anyone Say, "I
Don't Know, Let's Yahoo It!"
Sincerely,
Google

!! - Destiny - !!




Teacher:What is difference between Orange 'n Apple
Crack:The color of Orange is Orange
'n the Color of Apple is not Apple.. !






After 10 years of career (Bank Deposit):-
Teacher: 50 Lakhs
Doctor: 60 Lakhs
Engineer: 55 Lakhs
IAS Officer: 70 Lakhs
.
.
Sadhu/baba/Sant : 1,177 Crore.


"Choose Your Career Carefully"




LOL: One friend says to another -
"I have Facebook,Twitter,Google Plus,MSN Messenger,
Skype 'n Twitter."


2nd Friend: "Dude, do you have a Life??"

1st Friend: "OMG! No! Send me the link!"




No English Dictionary Has Been Able To Explain
The Difference Between The Two Words COMPLETE And FINISHED,


In A Way That's Easy To Understand.
Some People Say
There Is No Difference Between COMPLETE & FINISHED.

I Beg To Differ Because,
There Is : When You Marry The Right Woman,
You Are "COMPLETE"...
And
When You Marry The Wrong One,
You Are "FINISHED"!
And
When The Right One Catches You With The Wrong One,
You Are ..."COMPLETELY FINISHED" !




Never believe in 3 people:
Sagittarius, Aries, Pisces
They are the most selfish and mean. :/


Never lose 3 people:
Taurus, Cancer, Capricorn
They are the most sincere and true lovers..

Never share with 3 people:
Virgo, Libra, Scorpio
They can never keep secrets and cheat people by crocodile tears :/

Never reject 3 people:
Leo, Gemini, Aquarius
They are true,honest friends and never think bad for any one..?
which one is yours???? :D




What's The Difference Between Stupid 'n Idiot?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Stupid Will Never LIKE This Post.
'n
Idiot Will Never Comment On This Post.


What Will You Do Now.. ? :D




The story behind "ladies first":


Long ago, a man 'n woman were madly in love.
They wanted to get married but their parents didn't approve.
So they decided to kill themselves.

They thought the best way to do it was to leap off a clip.
The man couldn't bare to see his sweetheart fall before him.. !

so he convinced her he would go first, and he jumped..
.
.
.
.
.
But that bitch never did.. !




Some Sentiments Expressed At Their Best...


Dear Facebook,
Just Wait, One Day They All Will
Leave You Too!
Sincerely,
Orkut

Dear Optimist,
That's Not A Light At The End Of
The Tunnel, But A Train!
Sincerely,
Pessimist

Dear Icebergs,
Sorry To Hear About Global
Warming.
Sincerely,
Titanic

Dear Yahoo,
I've Never Heard Anyone Say, "I
Don't Know, Let's Yahoo It!"
Sincerely,
Google

!! - Destiny - !!




When Love Fail,Emotion Works,
Emotion Fail,Memories Works,
Memories Fail,Word Works,
When Everything Fails...


Take 750 ML Vodka,It Really Works.. !:))




Wife- If I Dismiss The Cook
'n Make Food Myself For A Month,
What Will You Pay Me..?


Husband- I Won't Have To Pay You,
You'll Get My Entire Insurance Amount.. !:)




3 Important Stages Of Life...
Before Marriage- 'MAD For Each Other'
During Marriage- 'MADE For Other'
After Marriage- 'MAD Because Of Each Other'.. !








Share this SMS



Boy-Isn't Our Principal An Idiot?


Girl-Do You Know Who I m?

Boy-No..

Girl-I m His Daughter.

Boy-Do U Know Me?

Girl-No.!

Boy-Thank God..!!




Sometimes...
I Feel To Write LOL At The End Of Every Answer In The Exams :)






3 Guys Name


What, Why, 'n When Were Talking

What:Why What R U Doing?

Why:I Dont Know What Are You Doing.

What:Why?

Why:Why R U Caling Me? What?

What:Now Why Did U Cal Me?

Why:What! When Did I Cal U?

When:What Is Your Problem Why Are You Calling Me?

Why:What? Did I Call You? When?

What & When: What

When:Why Are You Caling Urself?

Why:Did I Call Myself, When?

When:What?

What:...




Boy : You Look Exactly Like My Wife....
Girl : Ohhh... What's Your Wife's Name?


Boy : I'm Not Married Yet... ;-)

Moral : Learn New Methods To Propose.. ! :)






Bond meets a Tamil guy


Bond- My name is Bond (smiles and then says)

JAMES BOND

Tamil Guy- I am Sai..

Venkata sai

Shiva venkata sai

Narayana shiva venkata sai

Lakshmi narayana shiva venkata sai

Srinivasalu lakshmi narayana shiva venkata sai

Rajashekara shrinivasalu lakshmi narayana shiva venkata sai

Sitaraman rajashekara shrinivasalu lakshmi narayana shiva venkata sai 

Bond commits suicide ..!:D




The Real Value Of Infinity Is Known
When We Open The First Page Of Our Textbook
On The Night Before Exam
'n See The Number Of Pages To Be Read.. ! :))






What Are I and U...
Friend?
Lover?
Brother/Sister?
What?
.
.
.
What Your Heart Saying?
.
.
.
.
.
Dear,Please Sometime Use Your Brain...


I and U Are Vowels.. ! ;-) :-)




If You Are Sitting Among A Group of People
'n Their Heads Are Down
'n Yours Is Up Thats Not The Proof That
"You Are Confident"..
You Just Don't Have A Mobile.. ! ;-)








Share this SMS



Smallest Love Story:


"He Proposed,
She Smiled,
No Teeth !
.
.
He Died".. ! :) :D




Cute Proposal By A Lover:


My Name Is I..
My Problem Is Love...
My Solution Is You... :)




Some tourists in the Punjab Museum of Natural History were marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asked the guard, Santa Singh 'Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?' Santa replied, 'They are 3 million, four years, and six months old.' 'That's an awfully exact number,' says the tourist. 'How do you know their age so precisely?' Santa answered, 'Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.'






Love works in miracles every day:
Such as weakening the strong, 'n stretching the weak;
Making fools of the wise,'n wise men of fools;
Favouring the passions, destroying reason,
'n in a word,Turning Everything Topsy-Turvy.. !












Teacher:What is difference between Orange 'n Apple
Crack:The color of Orange is Orange
'n the Color of Apple is not Apple.. !








After 10 years of career (Bank Deposit):-
Teacher: 50 Lakhs
Doctor: 60 Lakhs
Engineer: 55 Lakhs
IAS Officer: 70 Lakhs
.
.
Sadhu/baba/Sant : 1,177 Crore.

"Choose Your Career Carefully"








Santa calls up "white house"
Santa: "I want to be the next president of USA"

Obama: "Are you an idiot??"
Santa: "Why??
is it Compulsory???"








Terrorible English by School P.T sir:

1.There is no wind in the football.

2.I talk,he talk, Why you middle talk?

3.You rotate the ground four times.

4.You go 'n understnd the tree. 

5. I'll give you clap.

6. Bring your parents with Your Mom 'n Dad

7.Why Haircut not cut?








A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy with four young mothers.
"You all have obsessions.",The doctor observed.

To the 1st mother, he said,
"You are obsessed with eating. You've even named you're daughter 'Candy'."

He looks to the 2nd mother saying,
"Your obsession is with money.
Again, It manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He looks to the third mother 'n says,
"Your obsession is alcohol.
This manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."

At this point,
The 4th mother Gets up,
Takes her little boy by the hand 'n says to him, "Come on, Dick, We're leaving!"








Thought for the night:

Don't waste time by thinking about your past or future!
Better kill some mosquitoes in that time.

So that you can sleep better.. !



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